


Those Shiny Days

by Nhitori



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Comfort, Crying, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Politics, Strong women leaders, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:00:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24139261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nhitori/pseuds/Nhitori
Summary: Fill for the Banned Together Bingo 2020 Square:Strong Women LeadersThe war is over, but wars don't just end.She's trying to be strong, but when will she reach the days she's dreamed of?
Relationships: (mentioned) - Relationship, Bernadetta von Varley/Hubert von Vestra, Edelgard von Hresvelg/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 1
Kudos: 50
Collections: Banned Banned Together Bingo 2020, Banned Together Bingo 2020





	Those Shiny Days

This was once a Monastery.

No longer could it be called that, and hadn’t been for quite a while. But it was once a monastery, and though it had been in places reduced to rubble, it had strong bones and had been easily rebuilt. The structure which was Garreg Mach… Its name had not been changed, of course, but it was not the same anymore. The architecture of it was beautiful, though. It was in a central position in Fodlan, though. And there were so many memories here. So many.

So it was that Edelgard remained. It was not a ‘palace’, she would not call it that. She was the Emperor, the uniting Emperor of Fodlan, and that was the extent of the titling she wished to have for herself. This title was one that she had earned through hard work, and nothing else was. To call this her ‘palace’ would be implying she had built it from nothing, and that was nothing that Edelgard wanted to imply whatsoever. Nor did she wish to imply she was better than anybody. This place was far from only hers.

The Black Eagle Strike Force- Whichever of them preferred it, of course, were welcome here. Similarly, its facilities had been restored enough that it even functioned as an academy to this day, though it was no ‘officer’s academy’ anymore. Many who graduated did intend to join government, in a military or administrative capacity, but the intention was just to offer education to those who otherwise might be unable to acquire it. Improving Fodlan was a long and arduous process- Building good public education far out in the country was unreasonable to finish quickly, so invitations were extended to particularly poor but interested children to come here and learn.

However… Some pieces of the structure were off-limits to the students, and that was where Edelgard found herself today. The ‘Goddess Tower’, a name that it still bore as a sign of respect to those who had come before, just as the title of Garreg Mach was. The church, Rhea, and those who served, had perpetuated a system that Edelgard needed to put an end to. Even so, people across Fodlan still held belief in their hearts and took comfort in it. Even so, she herself had come to understand some of the people involved in all of this. She had no intention of razing that memory to the ground, but of building a better future atop of it.

It would be difficult, of course it would, but she had a formidable empress at her side. Not at this moment- She was alone in the tower where their love had blossomed. Edelgard was in charge, she was the emperor. So her wife would be the Empress, that too, was simple, basic, titling. If she were to have a husband, he would have been the Emperor-Consort. She had no intention of relinquishing the role that she had poured her entire heart and soul into, no matter how a person might capture her heart and soul.

Oh, and how her wife _did_ capture her heart and soul, such that her heart and soul entirely yearned, staring into the courtyard, of a time when they might spend an entire afternoon sitting in that courtyard together, but as it was, she hardly snuck away to stand here and think at all- and Byleth was busy right now. Busy, they were always busy, but it wasn’t a strain on their relationship. Just a delay to the shiny days that they had promised each other. When the war is over, we’ll get lots of sweets, and we’ll lie down in the sun and just enjoy each other’s company. When the war is over…

But it wasn’t over, and it wouldn’t be over, not for a while yet. It had ended, they were triumphant. The _war_ was won, and done, but it wasn’t that simple. Even now, when Hubert had reported back that his own shady dealings- With Bernadetta’s help, of course, had eliminated the threat of Those Who Slither In The Dark. It should have been over, but war was more than battles, more than military might, and more than tangible threats to the peace.

War was instating policies, putting ideals into practice. It was offering aid and reparations to innocents caught in the cross-fire, it was repairing damage done to the country’s infrastructure and it was remotivating the workforce. All things that were going smoothly- All things that Edelgard continued to break her back to ensure would happen. Of course it took work, and of course she was capable. It was because of her efforts that it _was_ going smoothly. Byleth’s, too. Guiding the country as best they both could, from positions that they’d fought and killed and nearly died for.

When would it be over, she wondered? When would she achieve those shiny days? This entire time, she just wanted that. She wanted to be able to be happy, and she couldn’t be happy within society as it had been before. She would have always suffered, surrounded on all sides by those who harmed her or allowed her to be harmed. She wished that nobody would have to go through what she went through again, and she willed it into being, she brought that to fruition. Even still, the satisfaction of sparing others from her fate did nothing to calm her own selfish desire to spend one, normal, day.

A day where she didn’t need to think about her past, or the church, or her crest or _Fodlan at all_ for that matter. How disgusting was she, she wondered? A leader who wished for a day, just one, where she didn’t have to think about the good of her country at all. Where it didn’t matter and was just the place where she happened to be at that moment in time, not something she was responsible for, which called for her attention every hour of every day. Pathetic, right? How could she think a thing like that? How could she, after everything she did to reach this point? She couldn’t trust Fodlan in anybody else’s hands. She loved it too dearly and knew too well that only she could speak to power her vision of this world. Yet she wished she could forget about it, just for a bit. Just to be lazy one day in her life. To stop fighting.

_Please, let me stop fighting, just once…_

When had she fallen, trembling, to the floor? With her back to the wall of the tower, she was hardly the image of composure right now. She was nothing and nobody in this moment, no powerful uniting emperor of all Fodlan, but a frightened and overwhelmed woman. She wanted a break, but knew she had no way of getting one. She didn’t want to cause any problems. It was a conflict, full-force, of desires. The desire to rest. The desire to resolve. It left her, crumpled, paralyzed with this indecision of emotion. There was no solution to be found, and for that, because of that, she couldn’t even move.

She needed to get back to work. How long had it even been? She had a meeting with the western Merchants’ Association. Was she already late? She needed to be there. She couldn’t move. She couldn’t even _move_ until-

She lifted her head, just that much, at the sound of steps on the stairs. Somebody was coming up here. Somebody was looking for her and she was going to be in so much trouble. She was showing weakness. She was skipping out on a diplomatic meeting. She was a useless ruler. It was all a facade and she was about to be found out and deposed and-

“El?” It was Byleth.

“...Hey,” Edelgard greeted her, taking a deep breath and finally managing to at least adjust her posture to something a bit more dignified, though she didn’t have it in her to stand up. “I’m… Sorry, I’m running late for a meeting, aren’t I? I just. I’m…”

“Shh.” Byleth shook her head and approached, crouching down in front of Edelgard and offering her a soft smile. That radiant, rare smile of hers that was so infectious, Edelgard could never help but smile along, no matter the situation. “Ferdinand is handling that. I was planning to tell you when you arrived, but you never did.”

“I was here.” Edelgard shook her head and choked on her next words, “I was here, being weak, being a pathetic excuse for the Emperor. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I was… It’s stupid, I’m.”

“El.” Byleth reiterated, then set a box down between them. She gave her wife a knowing look. Edelgard just took a few more silent minutes to compose herself, then reached out and opened the box, finding inside… An assortment of sweets.

 _That_ was when she started crying. She had managed not to, up until now, but the sight of those chocolates and sugar candies all lined up and staring back at her was too much. Byleth, to her credit, didn’t panic that her gift might be unappreciated; After the time they’d spent together, it would be absurd if she couldn’t recognize the differences in Edelgard’s tears. Together, they had killed God and built a kingdom on her ashes- These types of couples had _best_ not be prone to such basic misunderstandings.

“I was just thinking that… We still haven’t been able to find that day when we can eat sweets and laze about and think about nothing,” Edelgard finally managed to put words to the emotions, “I was worried it wouldn’t come and. Right now is when you decide to get me out of my meeting, and bring me candies…”

“I was thinking it too, lately,” Byleth said, “How I haven’t been able to keep my promise to you, yet.”

“Ah…”

“Did you forget? I promised that I’d get you to a day like that. So this isn’t… Enough. This doesn’t count for my promise. But at least, can’t we have a little bit of time? I wanted to do something for you to say. I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to give that to you yet. You deserve it, so badly. But with everything…”

“There’s so much everything.” Edelgard groaned. “I don’t want to say I resent my work. I’m happy to be doing it. I’m grateful. I’m doing my best and it’s paying off. To say that I want to get away from it, it’s pathetic, isn’t it? Because I don’t. I just want to rest. But…”

“It’s not pathetic at all,” Byleth said, and picked up a sweet to put in her own mouth. “After everything? The fact that you haven’t left everything to me, and the others. That you’re still guiding us like this, is very strong.”

“When did you ever get so good with words?” Edelgard teased, and grabbed one for herself as well. She took a moment to let it melt in her mouth, savoring it, before she spoke again, “I’m guiding? That’s always been you, you know. Without you…”

“Without me you still would have won the war.” Byleth rolled her eyes. “It’s if anybody _else_ had me that you need to worry about.”

“Right. Because you’re strong, too,” Edelgard said, “You’re downright _dangerous_ , dear.”

“I am. That is how…” She smirked now. “I was able to threaten Ferdinand into taking over that meeting.”

“You!”

“What can I say? You know full well, I will use any tactics I can, to support my wife.”

“...I hope you know that, too.” Edelgard looked down. “It isn’t just that I want you to give me a lazy day in the future. I want you to be able to enjoy it with me. You’ve worked hard, too. All for the sake of me, and my dreams…”

“That’s right.”

“Ah! You were supposed to say something like, you did it for the good of Fodlan!”

“Why would I lie? I did it for you, El. It’s just a bonus that I actually agreed with you.”

“Mmph!” Edelgard covered her face and released an embarrassed noise. Even after years, Byleth could make her blush just with that stoic honesty of hers. And even after years, Byleth was still her rock, her guiding light. The one who could anchor her, and keep her present, make her smile with such ease.

Maybe it would be a long time coming, before those shiny, lazy days. But that was okay. Byleth could be those days, all on her own, in fleeting moments like this, until then. Until Edelgard could finally be happy, she’d find her happiness here.

When Fodlan was whole and happy, so too would its leaders be.


End file.
